Don’t we
know it all, the moment of awkward silence during a conversation. They tend to
happen on dates, but not only then it can also happen with certain friends,
especially if you don’t have anything in common and nothing to talk about. It’s
natural, we can’t see eye to eye with everyone and we have different interests.
A friendship or relationship can still be deep in certain cases, but not
always.
Well,
anyway, I’m actually writing this post for the opposite reason. There are
moments in a conversation, where silence happens and sometimes it’s a good
thing and it can mean different things.
It can just
be a natural break, where both people take a moment to think about what was
sad, or maybe a memory comes up, there could be so many reasons. It’s not that
you don’t know what to say next or you don’t know what to talk about, it’s just
a natural pause in between.
With
certain people in my life (my mum and my closest friends) sometimes words are
not needed. It’s like a blind understanding, you think the same thing and you
can finish each other’s sentences. That can also happen with a partner of
course.
Yes, most awkward
silences might happen with a stranger, but that doesn’t always have to be the
case. And even with a stranger temporary silence is a normal part of conversational rhythm. It’s us
human being how actually make it a big issue. Sometimes we are thinking about
it too much and that’s what makes it all weird and uncomfortable. We should
just stop worrying too much and focus on the actual conversation.
Silence
can have the total opposite effect on a situation. It can show a beautiful
moment of romance, intimacy and chemistry, where no words are needed.
When you’re
with anew friend or partner silence is normal, you can’t expect every single
minute to be filled with conversation. Sometimes we don’t have to say anything
for a few moments, but there is nothing bad about it. I always think about
going on a walk with whoever, you might just enjoy the moment, that could also
be the case when your enjoying a sunset, the view or other things.
Shy
people tend to have moments like this more often, but they just need more time.
I have moments when I’m shy as well (especially with men), but I learned to
deal with them.
The worst
thing to actually say to an introverted and shy person is that they are quiet.
I was like that as a child and always struggled when people said that. It’s the
same to be told that or thin or fat and it doesn’t help the situation at all. I
have changed a lot and learn a lot with different experiences. The most
important think in my eyes is to accept people the way they are and make them
feel comfortable, the same goes with silences!
So, all
in all I think that silences are normal and they are not awkward at all, we
make them awkward!
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